Unicorn Brethren

History

In the beginning was the Horn. And the Horn knew that it was — not just good; it was awesome.

One bright sunny day, the Horn deigned to fashion an equestrian mammal to ferry itself around.

Then the Horn planted itself into the horse's forehead, and at that moment, history was written.

This ultimate being came into existence, and this being became known as THE FIRST UNICORN.

And all of the other beasts of the ground and fowl of the air paid homage to this glorious beast.

It came to pass that evil came into the universe, and thus the mighty Unicorn wept with jealousy.

Not jealousy of evil, but jealousy of the universe before evil entered it. Yes, it was a paradox, but

that kind of detail did not matter to The Unicorn. And so he wept freely and without any shame.

And it also came to pass that a strange race known only as the Covenant rained down from the

skies in metal birds, carrying flaming swords, and destroying all in their path. And thus, much of

what the Unicorn knew and loved came to be destroyed. In righteous anger, the mighty Unicorn

decided to recreate the world in a flash of brilliance. And thus, the Unicorn Brethren came to be.

The Unicorn Brethren fought the Covenant with their own horns (not Horns, for there is only one

true Horn, which belongs to the One True Unicorn), and though for a time it appeared that they

might fall before the mighty onslaught of the evil Covenant, they eventually found ways in which

to begin to fight back against the Dark Race of the Unknown. And behold, they created MJOLNIR.

Yea, MJOLNIR was strong, nigh impenetrable, and the Unicorn Brethren wore it and fought the

Covenant gallantly. But their numbers dwindled in the absence of the One True Unicorn. For that

blessed being had withdrawn himself, to the Fortress of the Inner Horn, and had shielded all the

innocents from the wake of destruction that the Covenant visited upon them. And lo, they wept.

But one pointed to the sky (with his horn of noble honour), and neighed so that the others might

listen, and take heart. For an entirely new regiment of Unicorn Warrior Brethren poured forth from

a rift in the sky, chanting with vigor and full of life. As their manes swayed in the mighty wind, the

sky grew dark with horror. The Covenant had amassed as one. Would the brave Unicorns survive?

Members

Mafiascum name	Xbox LIVE name	Tag	Rank / Responsibilites	Nickname	Comments
ReaperCharlie	Reaper Charlie	BACN	Co-Founder, Historian	Alpha Unicorn
Fritzler	FunkmasterFritz	1CRN	Co-Founder, Karaoke singer	White Unicorn	Stop: Unicorn Time!
tanstalas	Reaper Kilo	EGGS	Original Member	Negro Unicorn	...breakfast?
AGar	The1AndOnlyAGar	N848	Original Member	Asian Unicorn
Flameaxe	BuhBuhBam13	WAFL	Original Member	BBM	Backslidden
Stefunny	Stefunny85	MILK	Original Member	Beaver Scraper	married to Fuben84
N/A	Fuben84	BAGL	Original Member		not from mafiascum
N/A	SpadeHouseRules	TOST	Original Member		not from mafiascum
N/A	Thane0fFife	MUFN	Member		not from mafiascum
scotmany12	everlong1289	EJ12	Member	David Grohl
Brutal Assassin	skyllus zYn	SKY	Member	Aztec Unicorn
N/A	xXEpicRainbowXx	STDS	Member		not from mafiascum
N/A	XxSoakedLyricxX	WIN	Member		not from mafiascum
N/A	Trash Hammer	EGGS	Member		not from mafiascum

Quotes

• (unofficial slogan) "Pwnin' Newbs Since 2008!" - ReaperCharlie
• "Guys, Unicorns exist and I am going to get one. Then you're all going to be jealous when I ride it around." - Fritzler
• "Get your forklifts ready for today's challenge..." - Flameaxe
• "Wait, there's a girl? BACK OUT, BACK OUT, BACK OUT, BACK OUT!" - Fritzler
• "White is the worst camouflage color ever against flowers and rainbows. No wonder unicorns are extinct." - DrippingGoofball
  • "Plus the constant rainbows imply that it's a very wet conditions, probably swampy. Malaria probably wiped them out." - Kublai Khan
  • "Or, judging by the historical photograph provided by ReaperCharlie, mercilessly hunted to death by bloodthirsty bands of Yellow-Bellied Unicorn-Eating Chickadees." - DGB
• "If you ain't first, you're last! And that last match, you guys were ALL last!" - Fritzler, after actually winning a match for once
  • "And yeah, I went -19, however, I got the W, and that is what I play for. Holler." -Fritzler
• "Hey, also, if you play Halo: Reach with us, your emblem has to be a unicorn. Yes, I'm serious." - Fritzler
  • "Heh. Yeah. It's sort of a majority-forced rule that everyone needs to have a Unicorn to party with us. I don't exactly know where it started being a rule, but Fritz was the first one that had the Unicorn emblem. I used to use the serpent with the cross behind it, but they took the serpent out, and so I was homeless. The Unicorns gave me a home, and so I adopted their propaganda with zeal... and... well, here I am today. A better person." - ReaperCharlie
  • "I will be brutally, anally raped before I change my emblem to a unicorn." - Knight of Cydonia
  • "Doable." - ReaperCharlie
• "Stef, are you a gypsy pixie? Confirm or deny." - ReaperCharlie
• "OMG UNICORNS!!!!!" - DeathRowKitty
• "Occupation change: Unicorn hunter time." - DTMaster
• "I am going to get a girl unicorn. who fucks boy horses with her horn." - Fritzler
• (talking about this pic) "I'm driving the unicorn. Stefunny is holding on.. (just before she assassinates me)" - tanstalas
• "I love unicorns! <3" - Haylen
• "GUYS, EXCITING NEWS! While rocking a Unicorn Emblem, a girl agreed to marry me. So yeah, Unicorns = hetero 4 lyfe. Ask Flameaxe and Reaper to confirm." - Fritzler
  • "This happened." - Flameaxe
  • "Yeah lol. It took like 3 minutes, and I was pissed because I have been talking to her for like... 5 days." - ReaperCharlie
  • "That is because no one wants to be with Asian Unicorns, they have small horns." - Fritzler
• "ATTENTION: Thane and I just got married in Fable III." - Fritzler
  • *Throws rice and prescribes STD treatment* - Stefunny
• "So... my wife and I are going to eat breakfast now." - ReaperCharlie (at 1 in the afternoon)
  • "...breakfast???" - tanstalas
• "Ha, we just got done playing. We had a lot of fun, between AGar, Stefunny, Flameaxe, and I. We were up to all sorts of shenanigans and unicorn stuff." - Fritzler
• "Reaper is cheating on the Unicorns with non-unicorn emblems. Discuss. :D" - Flameaxe
• "Also Fritz, you may not violate my cats." - Stefunny
• "Unicorn+Narwhal=Narwhal." - gandalf5166
  • "Wouldn't unicorn+narwhal=two horned freak? Or two horned god?" - Fritzler
• "Reck should totally get Reach so we can introduce him to Epic Rainbow... we'd be like matchmakers :P" - tanstalas
• "We have convinced random people on Halo: Reach to embrace the power of the 1 horn." - Fritzler
• "Where is the unicorn love tonight? Or are you all eating breakfast?" - tanstalas
• "I totally want to come on you." - ReaperCharlie
• "Ok, I'm gonna go put some clothes on, be right back." - Fritzler
• "I desire one of those excellent unicorn avatars. How might one proceed in procuring such an avatar?" - quadz08
• "Where is your unicorn, Flameaxe?" - ReaperCharlie
• "Highlight so far: Stefunny trying to prove she can assassinate like me, she sneaks up behind me, and gets yoinked by someone else shooting me in the head. Ha, don't you look silly now Stefunny?" - Fritzler
  • "Or me trying to assassinate you as you blow up from a sticky? - Stefunny
  • "Yeah, you're a punk." - Fritzler
• "That's the biggest man cannon I've ever seen..." - ReaperCharlie
  • *look of disbelief* "That's too big to be a man cannon." - Han Solo
• "When Stefunny failed to show up for a scheduled meeting on Halo: Reach and didn't return any phone calls, her fellow unicorn brethren reported her missing to the local police. However, it seems even the police have been infiltrated by the mafia, for the report itself vanished. Given the situation, you all assume that Stefunny is now dead.
  Stefunny, townie, was killed on Night 2!" - Equinox, in Open 268: Raise the White Flag